30+ Funny Sarcastic Quotes to Make Your Facebook Friends Hate You… or Like You More

Some say that sarcasm is the use of words that mean the opposite of what you really want to say especially in order to insult someone, to show irritation, or to be funny.

Others say that sarcasm is the highest form of intelligence and it increases creativity for both expressers and recipients.

Expressing sarcasm to or receiving sarcasm from trusted friends increases creativity without causing any disputes.

These Someecard’s insulting and sarcastic quotes are perfect for you to post onto your Facebook wall if you want to intelligently insult someone or to become more likeable among friends. So, if you are already trusted among your friends they will like you more, and if you’re not… they will kind of hate you.

sarcastic quotes
Thanks for the birthday wishes from everyone who noticed my name today in the upper right corner of your Facebook page.

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I thought I was awesomely creative, imaginative, and original. Then i found Pinterest.

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Spending a day on Facebook has once again fooled me into believing I have an actual social life.

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Fake people have an image to maintain, real people just don’t give a shit.

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Want to freak out your neighbours? Name your wifi… “FBI Surveillance Van”

sarcastic quotes
I Googled “Who Gives a Shit?” My name wasn’t in the search results.

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If you really loved me, you would say it on my Facebook Wall.

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May your life someday be as awesome as you pretend it is on Facebook.

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Wow honey, the house is so clean! Was the internet down for a while today?

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I think Facebook is broken. I put up a status and no one liked it even though I refreshed it a few times.

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I live in constant fear of accidentally mentioning something I only know about you because I’ve stalked you on the internet.

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It would be significantly easier to wish you a happy birthday if you were on Facebook.

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We’ll be best friends forever because you already know too much.

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Facebook constantly reminds me that people uglier than me are getting engaged.

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I would delete you off my Facebook friends list, but then you wouldn’t be able to see all the fun things I do without you.

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My only professional ambition is to get a desk where no one can see my computer monitor other than me.

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I’ve had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.

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Your call is very important to us. So please enjoy this 40 minutes flute solo.

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I only drink on two occasions. When it’s my birthday and when it’s not.

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Friendships must be built on a solid foundation of alcohol, sarcasm, inappropriateness, and shenanigans.

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Hurry up and clean the house! We don’t want people to think we actually live the way we actually live!

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Grammar: the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit.

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They say you are what you eat, but it’s funny, because I don’t remember eating a fucking legend.

sarcastic quotes
Dear Lord, please let there be a zombie apocalypse so I can start shooting all these motherfuckers in the face.

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Marriage basically consists of 3 fucking rings: Engagement ring, Wedding Ring, Suffering.

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I judge people due to their taste in music.

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You are entitled to have an opinion. I am just letting you know that it is stupid.

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You have a right to your opinion, and I have a right to tell you how fucking stupid it is.

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I want to like people, but they’re just so fucking stupid.

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I can’t wait to see you wearing nothing but a condom.

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Dear life, when I asked if my day could get worse, it was a rhetorical question not a challenge.

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I’m not anti-social, I’m anti-stupid.

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You make me wish I had more middle fingers.

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You ass must get jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.

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Keeping you job is the new raise.

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The best thing about you and me is me.

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No, no, no. I’m not insulting you. I’m just describing you.

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Nothing brightens up a room like your absence.

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I don’t fart. I whisper in my panties.

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You should stop worrying about your weight and start worrying about your boring personality.

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It’s not you, it’s my horrible choice in men.

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I admire your relentless drive to further your education and avoid real work.

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Of course women don’t work as hard as men… They get it right the first time.

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